Random conversations

     I've never really felt like a people person: I'm definitely an introvert, I don't enjoy being in crowds, I'm a very private person, and I hate small talk. Yet somehow, people always end up talking to me - people I don't know at all. I even had this happen the first time I was in Russia and could barely speak the language. Curiously enough, several of those encounters ended well because I'm really good at expressing things without words and I always had a map on me, so at the very least, if I heard "where" and a questioning tone, I could say "I'm sorry, I don't speak Russian well," while holding out the map. The one where a guy handed me a rose and started declaiming poetry, however, did not go so smoothly. 

     On the whole, though, in English-speaking countries, I think people just talk to me because I try to be polite and honest, and I keep my eyes up and aware of my surroundings. People will catch my eye in a store line and start commiserating about the wait. I reply politely, so they keep going. Pre-pandemic, I even had someone connect with me on a class webconference: she decided I looked interesting and started sending me snarky comments on a private chat, trying to make me laugh while the professor was talking (we are still friends to this day). Another time, I tried out a surfing camp, and someone started telling me how horrible the camping conditions were. She seemed like a nice person, so I mentioned I had an extra bed in my hotel room she was welcome to share. Twelve years later, we still write each other several times a year. 

     For the most part though, I never see these people again. The pandemic has severely reduced the number of these instances in public, because the gentleman and I have only been out to the grocery store late at night to avoid crowds. Curiously, though, it's started happening more over the phone. I call in to a county permitting counter, and listen politely as the person tells me what their kids have been doing while they work from home. A contractor calls to ask a question, and 10 minutes later, I know all about their latest spat with their spouse/ significant other. One lady who holds a similar position to mine in a company we work with has, I guess, decided we're good friends, and gives me updates on what's going on in her and her friends' lives every time we talk. 

     Perhaps it's just that I listen well, but it baffles me that people are willing to tell total or near strangers so much about their lives without any reciprocation. I make polite noises and generic comments, but as noted above, I am a private person and do not like involving others in my affairs. (Musings on a blogspot, of course, are totally different. Trust me.) Maybe I just have a tendency to run into extroverts; maybe everyone's feeling the crunch these days and needs a little extra human connection; I don't know. But I will never not be amazed at how many people are happy to talk about intensely personal things if you're just willing to listen.