Accident and recovery

On September 10 of this year, I missed a step at work, fell, and messed up my foot. It hurt a lot, but I didn't think it was broken since I could still move my toes, so I made an appointment for the next afternoon and stayed home, following the RICE technique. Believe it or not, it took a week to get the results back, and only because I was calling literally every day- and then every hour- to ask why it was taking so long. Results: multiple chip fractures on the outer side of the ankle bones. Another 4 days went by before I could get to a podiatrist, who promptly put me in a walking boot and told me not to put any weight on it for at least 3 more weeks. After two weeks in ace bandages and not touching anything, I looked like a zombie sausage.

The doc wanted me in a knee-high boot, but apparently they only had low boots, which suited me fine cause the dang thing was still ridiculously heavy. I didn't get a picture, but in the last few days of not being able to put any weight on the foot, my "bad" calf was quite literally a half an inch larger than my good one, just from lugging that weight around. Thankfully, 4 weeks after the injury, I was able to start physical therapy.

Too old.

Sometimes, I get sad when I realize that I'm "too old" for all the fantastical things in life. All the magic and fairy tales happen to people when they're children, teens, or young adults. I don't have a letter from Hogwarts to look forward to, Peter Pan would never visit me. I'm too old to start Jedi training, too suspicious to be taken in by fairy lies or crafty promises. Mysterious beings don't cross my path, and magic seems to have trickled away. Heroes prefer pretty, impressionable young things, and there is a dearth of thrones to take over or countries to save. I'm too poor to be eccentric, too creaky to be a ninja, and goodness knows I'm tried to find a million hidden talents, to no avail.

It seems kind of bleak now and then.

And then I realize that I've made my own magic.

I learn languages for fun so I can travel and talk to people way outside my comfort zone.
I study so I can improve myself and help others, and hopefully find a place I can do the most good.
I grow things in my garden just for fun, to feel life unfurling.
When I hit a block, where things don't work, I sidestep and try more things (don't quit!).
I started weightlifting to keep my strength and agility as I get older.
I try to smile at everyone, because there have been days when a stranger's smile saved me.

I may not be able to wave a wand, or use the force, or summon minions, or conquer nations. I may never ride a broom, fly with the birds, or swim in the ocean deeps. I will probably live an expected human lifespan, never jump through time, pet dragons, or play with the fairies.

But I guess, in the end, I'll do what I can. As long as I never stop trying, it will be enough.