Huzzah! Finals are done, grades are coming in (all As so far), and I'm about to set off on winter break with family and friends on the east coast. In light of the next few weeks being a vacation, I've decided to put updates on hold until I get back, so that I can focus on relaxing and relationships instead of making sure updates get posted in time. So here's a quick post for the holidays, and I'll see you all when I get back, on January 14th!
One of the things I've been working on this semester is self-acceptance. I have never been one to follow the crowd, but lately I've been doubting whether what I'm doing is the "right" thing to do. I'm in my thirties, in college, broke as heck, and facing the absolute unknown of graduation and entry into an extremely sluggish job market and economy. If you'd asked me 10 years ago- heck, even 5 years ago- where I'd be at this time in life, this would not be it.
But does that really mean that what I'm doing is wrong, or less valid than if I'd followed the traditional "college after high school, married and a kid by 30" track? Logically, of course, the answer is no, but sometimes logic isn't the main player in our brains. Even though I keep following the path I've chosen, and keep making decisions based on where I want to be 1, 2, or 5 years down the road, I still question if what I'm doing is "right." Not in a sense of legally or morally proper, but that blasted voice of society that lurks in the back of my brain keeps whispering that no, I should have finished all this long ago, and be in a properly situated household.
One thing I've noticed throughout the years, however, is that those little voices that sit in the back of important meetings, gathering, or even our own brains and talk about what should or shouldn't be done... they're not usually the most creditable sources. If they were, they'd be in the thick of things, not shadowed away in the back. When people do it, they're usually trying to convince you to sell yourself short, box yourself in, and not break through the boundaries they've set on themselves as well as anyone willing to listen.
As my friends and family continue to point out, I am dealing my current situation because I planned it that way. I knew going to school at my age wouldn't be easy, and that my finances would have to scale back drastically, but I'm doing it because it makes my future brighter. It will end, and things will get better, because that's been my goal for the past four and a half years, and even though the end is scary, it'll be a better situation than if I hadn't gone back. I chose this, I'm going to stick through it, even if people with "normal" lives wouldn't have done things my way. Cheers!
One of the things I've been working on this semester is self-acceptance. I have never been one to follow the crowd, but lately I've been doubting whether what I'm doing is the "right" thing to do. I'm in my thirties, in college, broke as heck, and facing the absolute unknown of graduation and entry into an extremely sluggish job market and economy. If you'd asked me 10 years ago- heck, even 5 years ago- where I'd be at this time in life, this would not be it.
But does that really mean that what I'm doing is wrong, or less valid than if I'd followed the traditional "college after high school, married and a kid by 30" track? Logically, of course, the answer is no, but sometimes logic isn't the main player in our brains. Even though I keep following the path I've chosen, and keep making decisions based on where I want to be 1, 2, or 5 years down the road, I still question if what I'm doing is "right." Not in a sense of legally or morally proper, but that blasted voice of society that lurks in the back of my brain keeps whispering that no, I should have finished all this long ago, and be in a properly situated household.
One thing I've noticed throughout the years, however, is that those little voices that sit in the back of important meetings, gathering, or even our own brains and talk about what should or shouldn't be done... they're not usually the most creditable sources. If they were, they'd be in the thick of things, not shadowed away in the back. When people do it, they're usually trying to convince you to sell yourself short, box yourself in, and not break through the boundaries they've set on themselves as well as anyone willing to listen.
As my friends and family continue to point out, I am dealing my current situation because I planned it that way. I knew going to school at my age wouldn't be easy, and that my finances would have to scale back drastically, but I'm doing it because it makes my future brighter. It will end, and things will get better, because that's been my goal for the past four and a half years, and even though the end is scary, it'll be a better situation than if I hadn't gone back. I chose this, I'm going to stick through it, even if people with "normal" lives wouldn't have done things my way. Cheers!
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